You’ve made the big decision to return to work. Now what? The following hints will help smooth your return to work.

Plan ahead
One of the most important things you can do to simplify your life is to schedule your return to work for a time when you can give your full attention to combining your career and motherhood. Avoid trying to "fit in" other major events, such as moving to a new house, having your aging parents move in with you, or getting ready for the winter holidays. Juggling your new routine as a working mother with other stress-filled activities only makes the transition that much more difficult.

Separation anxiety
It’s true, leaving your baby with a nanny or other child-care provider will be hard because you now have a love affair going with this little person. Although it may take you a while to realize, going back to work doesn’t end this love affair–the bond between you and baby will continue to grow. A child-care provider doesn’t replace you in baby’s life–you’re still mom. Instead, she or he becomes another loving presence in baby’s life. Baby has enough love for both.

The first day of child care will require a great deal of adjustment for both you and baby. To help make the transition smoother, try these hints:

• Help baby get used to being in another person’s care. Ask someone to stay with the baby in your home a few times. You can work in another room, out of baby’s sight.

• Get baby used to going out. Take baby with you shopping, to church, or to restaurants.

• If you plan to use a child-care provider outside your home, visit the provider several times with baby before returning to work. Spend an hour there each time, allowing both of you to get used to new surroundings.

• Don’t make a fuss when you’re dropping baby off. Rather, have the provider create a distraction while you slip out. And as you’re driving to work, realize that the tears subside quickly. Also, don’t worry if baby doesn’t cry or seem to care that you’re leaving. Baby’s awareness of your presence and absence as well as fears about separation varies over the first months and years of life.

Answering the big question
What do you do when baby gets sick? Before this happens (and it will), find someone–perhaps a relative or friend–who will care for your ill baby. Also, find out the policy of both your company and your spouse’s company on taking personal leave, vacation, or sick leave to stay home with baby. If necessary, check with your local hospital, to see if they have a care program for sick children.

Words of advice for working moms
For any mother, making the transition to being a working mom is difficult. If you find yourself feeling guilty about your choice, try these tips:

• Talk to other mothers who are juggling a career and motherhood. Ask them to share ways they’ve found to maximize their time with their babies.

• Read some of the recent research that shows that children with working moms thrive just as well as those with stay-at-home moms. For example, a study funded by the National Institute of Mental Health found that the notion that working women are frazzled and guilt-ridden and that their children are in trouble was a myth. In fact working women had more self-esteem and improved physical and mental health. In addition, numerous studies show virtually no difference between children with working mothers and those with stay-at-home moms.

• Keep reminding yourself of the reasons why you decided to return to work in the first place.

• Clear off your away-from-work calendar as much as possible so that you’ll have quiet time at home to enjoy your baby and your spouse.

• Realize that if other people–family and friends–disagree with your decision, they are well intentioned but they aren’t walking in your shoes. Thank them for their input while retaining the courage of your own convictions about what’s best for your family.